Recently, our long-time friend, colleague, and mentor to hundreds of social workers, Arseniy Pavlovskyi, visited office of AFEW-Ukraine in Kyiv.

This meeting was especially meaningful for us because, after more than 20 years of working together, Arseniy has become much more than just an expert advisor to our team.

Who is Arseniy Pavlovskyi?

Arseniy is a psychologist with a Master’s degree in Clinical Psychology, specializing in Health Psychology, as well as a Master’s degree in Social Work. In his work, he draws on narrative, solution-focused, and other collaborative approaches.

He specializes in clinical psychology and brief therapy (member of EBTA) and has spent the last two decades supporting adolescents in some of the most difficult life circumstances, particularly those with experience of psychoactive substance use (PSU), many of whom seek help involuntarily.

Our work with Arseniy began in 2004. He was involved in developing many innovative harm reduction approaches, trained some of the first outreach workers within the “Globus” project, and since 2012 has become an integral part of major AFEW-Ukraine programs, including Bridging the Gaps. His trainings, practical counseling tools, and manuals remain a “gold standard” for professionals seeking ways to build trust with adolescents.

Support during wartime: from Latvia to Ukraine

Today, Arseniy continues his work in new realities. He actively supports Ukrainian adolescents who were forced to relocate to Latvia because of the war, helping them adapt and find stability. At the same time, he remains closely working with our team and Doctors of the World (Netherlands) as a supervisor within the Beyond Trauma project, providing invaluable professional support to Ukrainian specialists who face war challenges and pain every day.

His visit to Kyiv gave us an opportunity to discuss some of the most pressing questions: how adolescents have changed, why pressure does not work, and how professionals can take care of themselves while staying “in the same boat” as their clients.

Read the full conversation below.

What can a specialist or social worker do today to become more effective in working with adolescents during the wartime?

The most important thing today is honesty. Right now, both the adolescent and the professional are in the same boat — we are all living through the same difficult conditions. A professional should model how to cope with challenges without hiding their own human experience. If your feelings are similar, it is okay and even helpful to talk about it. That’s how trust is built. In peaceful times, adult advice can often feel like lecturing, but now we are all trying to endure and find a way forward together. That creates more equal and constructive conditions for communication.

What is one piece of advice for someone meeting an adolescent who uses psychoactive substances for the first time?

The most important thing is to pause and resist the urge to act immediately. An adult’s first impulse is often to do something right away to make the adolescent stop using. But this is ineffective and usually damages the relationship. The situation needs to be accepted as it is. At the early stages, adolescents often experience more perceived “benefits” than harm from substance use, and they have their own reasons for it. Instead of handing them a brochure titled How to Quit (for example), try first to understand their motivation and assess the specific health risks they face.

What mistakes do adults most often make when trying to “help”?

Pressure and judgment. Adolescence is a period of resistance, so when faced with pressure, young people often simply break contact. Professionals and parents often try to “fix” the adolescent to relieve their own discomfort about the situation. But what is needed instead is radical acceptance: recognizing that our ability to control someone else’s behavior is limited. The relationship must come before the intervention. If adolescents feel they are not being pressured, they will eventually talk about their problems and ask for advice.

You work a lot with adolescents who come to counseling involuntarily (through school or police referral). How do you build trust with them?

It is a paradoxical situation: they were forced to come, yet they still showed up. These adolescents often arrive with a strategy—to stay silent or deny everything. What helps is validating their resistance. You can say: “You have every right to disagree that you need help.” Sometimes adolescents are right when they say it is actually their parents who need help, not them.

If they were referred by the police, they usually have a clear motivation — to be left alone. That can be used constructively: let’s talk about what needs to change, so the system no longer has to interfere in your life. The key is understanding the meaning behind their resistance, rather than fighting their “defense mechanisms.”

What should change at the level of services and communities so that adolescents can truly access support?

We need much greater sensitivity to rapidly changing needs. What worked three years ago may no longer motivate young people today. Adolescents themselves must be involved in designing projects and services. Young people are already used to hearing messages like “don’t be afraid to ask for help” and they know about chatbots and online support. But it is equally important to understand the content they consume—platforms like TikTok have enormous influence, and not all of it is helpful. Professionals need to be where adolescents are, and understand their constantly evolving subcultures.

What gives you the feeling that this work still matters, even under such difficult circumstances?

What inspires me is being able to maintain a professional position even when emotions run high. For example, when I can resist the urge to criticize an adolescent for strange—or even disturbing—fantasies, and instead try to understand where those fantasies come from and what emotional void they are trying to fill.

Another thing that gives me a sense of purpose is seeing results years later. Recently, a young woman I worked with when she was 16 wrote to me. She is now 20, studying at university in Latvia, has learned the language, but has not lost her connection to Ukraine and wants to contribute here. Moments like that—when you see that your support helped someone choose a dignified way of life — are the most inspiring.

Our conversation with Arseniy reminded us once again: there are no universal solutions in working with adolescents. Instead, there is trust, acceptance, and a willingness to stay present. Genuine connection, respect for a young person’s experience, and sensitivity to their needs create the space where real support and positive change become possible.